Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Dirt Co.

**The following program is a paid advertisement and this station does not endorse this product and is not responsible for the claims therein.**





FOLKS! Are your kids SICK and TIRED of their BORING old TOYS?!

Boring balls!

Strange skates!

Squirt gun not fun any longer?!

Is that old swing set not just doing it for them any more?

Do your kids complain that their bikes are BOOORIIIING!?

Chalkboard no fun?!?!
(Very nice picture by the way)




WEEEELLLL! Have we got the toys for YOU!

CHEAP!

EASY TO FIND!

And HOURS and HOURS of playtime fun!

Just LOOK at these satisfied customers!


So WHAT is this amazing new product that has kids occupied for HOURS of fun?!?!



















It is called:


















Dirt!

You heard me right! Dirt! It is AMAZING!

That's right, that's right!! Kids have a chance to use their imagination, get filthy, and at a low cost too!

Check out this DIRT play action!

Dirt! A child's best friend!

A Parent's worst nightmare!*

BUT THAT IS NOT ALL!!!

Also available:

BOX!!**

With order of box, receive free dirt!
Just take into your back yard, and let the fun begin!

ROCKS!**
Available in white...


And broken brick!

And don't miss out on the new and improved...

STICK!!**




But THAT'S NOT ALL!
Order in the next 20 minutes, and get Box, Rocks, Dirt and Sticks for the one-time, low, low price of only $39.99.

You heard me right! Only $39.99!!

Your kids can also enjoy hours and hours of fun -without complaints of boredom! For only $39.99! Just think of all the fun that YOUR kids will enjoy!

So order YOUR new Box, Rocks Dirt and Sticks today!

Some assembly required.

Be sure to ask the phone helper about new sales opportunity with Dirt, Co!

*Not responsible for costs associated with bathing filthy kids!
**Not responsible for cost associated with owning of home or actual dirt, or costs associated with actual ownership of trees, rocks or broken bricks.

Please excuse me, folks. I am strange!

I can't WAIT to embarrass my kids when they are teens!
BWAAA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!! (Evil laugh!)

I apologize again for my strangeness!


3 comments:

technoman said...

Hey, don't knock the box! (Not intentionally trying to rhyme.) It was rated as one of kid's favorite things to play with. Seriously!

technoman said...

Darn! I missed the 20 mins.! I wonder if the price went up!

"Hello?? Dirt Co.? Are there assembly instructions included? It comes free with imagination? Great! That's included as an added bonus and is free, too? Wonderful!"

Your kids are REALLY going to love you when they're teens!

Dawn Marie said...

HEY! I should have you be a contributor! You will keep all my readers in stitches!